Belief 1: Believe in Yourself!

"To believe in your own thought, to believe that what is true for you in your heart
is true for all mankind-that is genius." - Ralph Waldo Emerson


In the mid 80’s in a crowded classroom at the women’s club in downtown Atlanta, Georgia, I received some information that would change my life forever. I knew as I sat there that this information would greatly improve my life and believe me there was room for improvement at all levels. I was enrolled in a Ralph Waldo Emerson Philosophy class.

What I learned in this class would stay with me for the rest of my life. In the years that followed no matter what occupation I was in, where I was living or what the economy was like I prospered with this philosophy. In this class I decided to make Ralph Waldo Emerson my business partner. In order to by his business partner I had to follow his principles and apply them to the way I would do my business. It worked.

Principles are reliable unlike opinions or trends. Principles are not subject to person, place or thing. This means no matter what the economy was like or where I was, I could prosper. I did not have to be born to a certain family or live in a certain area or belong to a certain church or country club. Principles are valid and do not require membership or approval as he refers to it, I did not bend down to societies or badges.

The first principle of belief I learned in my class was to “believe in yourself”. As the above quote suggests, believe in your own thought. I didn’t know how to do this or even begin. However, the idea of this was very exciting to me. I could believe in myself. I didn’t have to take any class or join any club or get anyone’s approval to believe in myself. The real value of this idea was the fact that I already had what it takes to do this.

I loved the idea that I had what it takes. Much of my life had been spent in chasing for the right connections, the right approvals, the things that I thought were missing in order to succeed. The realization that I had what it takes made me sit up in my chair and pay attention. I was on a new journey, a new direction that would move me from struggle to success. How I would do this is found in this Emerson quote, ”Trust thyself, every heart vibrates to that string”.

The quote of trusting yourself can be found in the life of every successful artist, inventor, teacher, or business person. In my life I was not taught to trust my heart but actually the opposite. I was taught the opposite not to harm or limit me but to protect me. The general message we receive in our culture is “conform” and you will be accepted and you will reap the controlled benefits of conformity. This is the game is had learned well but had done very poorly with as I was always wanting something that I believed I didn’t have and thus my neediness was a self-fulfilling belief.

The catch in life that Emerson teaches is you can’t keep what is not yours. To conform merely for the rewards of conformity puts you on a collision course with life. Be mindful please as I am not saying ALL conformity is wrong and every original thought we have is right. I am suggesting that believing FIRST in your original, unfiltered, thought has value and needs to be examined. In my business career some of the best ideas I had were thins that seemed to come out of left field. Some of the best marketing concepts were thoughts taken to work and passed by others that I admired and felt appreciated original thoughts. Tweaking and improving these ideas got great results.

How many times have you said to yourself, “I should have gone with my first thought”? We 2nd guess ourselves in a culture that demands conformity. Emerson teaches that “Imitation is suicide” meaning what we produce from a pure, spot within ourselves has value. The beauty is we already have what it takes to do this. Trying to imitate others or comparing myself to my competitors weakens my intention. Staying with the belief that I have what it takes moves me up the road.

I have found the best way to sell anything, if it’s property, merchandise, or ideas, is to first believe in the value yourself. If I believe that I am giving the best service along with the best possible price then I am standing on solid ground and come across that way.

The genius Emerson refers to has us doing the right thing at the right time. What a wonderful way to live. When we are in tune to this genius we pick up the phone and call the right person at the right time and get results.

When I first started to apply this principle to my selling career it was in the mortgage business in Atlanta, Georgia. I had just moved there didn’t know anybody and had to rely on cold calls for making contacts, this was very difficult as I had no connections. I was a Yankee in a Southern City.

Daily on my way to work I would pass this particular beautiful Real Estate office on the edge of town. One day I gathered up as much courage as possible and went into the office and introduced myself to a very unimpressed receptionist who informed me no soliciting was allowed there. The office was overwhelming. I felt like such a hick in this beautiful white marble office, with Chinese planters, oriental rugs and vases of fresh flowers. I left with my tail between my legs.

As I began to practice the idea of having what it takes and believing in myself something happened as a result. One Friday on the way to work I just felt I should stop in that office one more time, plus I was in a good mood as it was Friday and wouldn’t care about being rejected as much. I went in the office and a miracle occurred the receptionist had called in sick that day.

I quickly went and stood by the mail boxes in a side room and tried to figure out my next brilliant maneuver to meet some real estate agents and possibly offer my services. On the wall of this mail room was a big picture of Vince Lobartti as former Green Bay Football coach with many of his quotes below the picture of him. I began reading his very strong, inspirational quotes.
All the sudden as if jerked back to realty I heard a strong, southern,feminine voice say, “You like Vince Lombartti?” I turned around and it was a short, well coiffured, meticulously dressed lady with red leather, jewel encrusted slippers on. She was very short but had a big presence.Her sudden appearance what seemed like out of no where startled me into complete honesty. I blurted “as a matter of fact I do like him”. I went on to tell her, but I think I have to like him as Football in Green Bay, Wisconsin is not only a game it is a religion. She laughed. I explained, I had attended school up there and was in his daughter’s class. The packers used my dorm for their summer camp and I played cards with a couple of them. Now this was way before ball players were under multi-million dollar contracts and superstars, they were just ordinary people back then.

The next thing I remember is the look on her face. It was like someone had told her she had won the lottery. She took me by the hand and with a religious type whisper said you really knew some the players when he was the coach. Yes, I said. She then confessed to me that Vince Lombartti was her hero. She told me she was the broker of that office and managed it and used his inspiration to run this office. She then took me by the hand and led me to one agent after another and introduced me as “Vince” who lived in Green Bay and knew packers when the other “Vince” was the coach there. The introduction was done in the manner of a minister doing a service. Her message was very clear to her agents….Get to know Vince.

That break opened more doors for me that a full page ad in the Atlanta Constitution Newspaper. I was known as the other “Vince”. I could have not pulled this off unless Ralph Waldo Emerson was my business partner. I believed in my own thought, my own intuition, my own feelings about stopping at that office even if I had been told by the receptionist, it would be of no good to stop there.

My inner genius, that we all have, urged me to stop at this office and I listened against the odds. I began to rely on this inner genius more often and had many victories maybe not as memorable as this one but memorable just the same. There were times when it seemed to be shut down or out of touch and I also learned what caused that.

There is a big secret that we need to know if we are to gain access to this inner voice. Honesty at all times under all conditions keeps this voice activated. If we try and hide something it begins to shut down. As Emerson again suggests, “Be, not seem” What beautiful strong advise. I am so tempted to tell half truths or not come completely clean. Every time I do the results are that I am on my own I have no support from the unseen business partner. You can’t believe your own thought or feelings if they are in any way clouded by untruth. It is very subtle but very powerful.

Be and not seem it possibly the best advice you will ever get. It worked for me in every circumstance I was ever in. To act like you like someone when you don’t is doing you more damage than good. To use any type of negative review of someone else to get the business is again more damaging to you than to your customer. Birds do come home to roost. Doing anything that creates anything other than a win-win deal will harm you in the long run. Believe me I can show you the scars. As Emerson suggests, “What you are speaks so loudly that I can’t hear what you’re saying.

One of the things I do when working with a potential client is to find a common denominator. I would search for clues to tell me things they liked or didn’t like so I could agree with them or act interested in what they found interesting. This is a good way to establish a business relationship if done honestly. However, many times I would make things up just to show my client how much we had in common. It doesn’t work. Be….not seem.

My success with the Real Estate Lady was based on complete honestly. I think I was so open as I was unprepared to make anything up. I blurted the truth right out of me. If I had tried to figure out some way to impress her and find something we both had in common it wouldn’t work. One of the things I had the most difficulty with is realizing that walking away from certain deals or transactions would benefit more that if I got them. This is where this business alliance with RWE is so valuable.

Emerson’s philosophy is a plan, a map, to gain access to this genius we all have. This potential is endless and has prospered countless people who have successfully tapped into this rich gift. I’ve got what it takes is turning on our light gaining access to our God given genius. We’ve got what it takes. This belief is very simple and very powerful use it well.